Bow and Arrow Troubles!

My Dad decided to build a back porch on our house. It took him quite some time to finish it too. He put painless ours into it and had just gotten the green fiberglass roof panels up when this all took place.

Well, ya see, I recieved a bow and some arrows from somewhere. Mom told me I could shoot them in the back yard but to be careful cause they were dangerous. I was having a great time shootin the arrows. The only problem was that I only had like four arrows and it was getting old chasing them across the pasture. I decided it would be much easier to shoot em straight up in the air to see how high they went. Plus, you didn't have to chase em as far. After shooting up a couple I had it down pat. That is right up until one of them didn't go quite straight up and when it came down it went right in Dad's new roof. I quickly climbed up on the roof of the house and managed to lean over on the porch roof and pull the arrow out. In a scurry I climbed back down to assess the damage only to find a very little hole about the size of a dime. Sure that Dad wouldn't see it I returned to the bow and arrow. Lesson learned I decided I should move further away from the house before continuing. However, the very next arrow I shot came down directly in the middle of the porch roof. In a panic I realized that I wouldnt be able to reach it from the roof or crawl on the new roof to retreive it. I entered the porch and could barely grab the tip of the arrow hanging from the roof. It wouldn't budge and I realized at this point I was screwed in a big way! When Dad came out on the porch the first thing he noticed was the arrow. He turned to me and gave me a look that made me certain I was probably close to my last breath. Course I told him i was sorry about a bazillion times. When he asked me what was I thinking I replied with my usual answer "I don't know!" For some reason I never seen the bow and arrow again!!

My Momma and Her Gun!!

As i got older i remember us having a few shotguns that me and dad used for turkey shoots and target shooting. To this day there is just something fun about shooting a shotgun at a clay pigeon. Not to toot my own horn but I'm a pretty good shot. My mom was never into the shotguns that i remember much. She did, however, own a small revolver that i believe was my grandpas police gun. I never seen her shoot it but she always said she could. I let her tell me that and then i would just nod and smile while thinking "sure you can." Well one day i was out by our pond doing a bit of fishing when i seen a really small water moccasin swimming about ten feet off the bank. This always excited me cause it give me an excuse to shoot the shotgun. I ran as fast as i could back to the house. As i burst through the back door mom said "whats wrong?" and i replied "there's a snake in the pond i gotta shoot!!" I grabbed the shotgun and loaded it as i was headed to the back door. Just then mom turned the corner, with her little pistol in hand, right in front of me and out the back door. We get to the pond and she asked me where the snake was so she could shoot it. Trying not to bust a gut i pointed to the snake and told her to give it a whirl. As i was laughing she raised her pistol, gave aim and squeezed off a round. This is when i began to not be able to hold myself and started laughing so hard i could hardly see from the tears in my eyes. Suddenly mom says "there ya go, one dead snake." It took a sec or two for my brain to actually comprehend what i had hear. I wiped the tears from my eyes and gazed into the water. There about ten feet from the bank was the snake..........his head was about six inches from his body!! I suddenly began to choke to the taste of shoe leather i had going on in my mouth. Who would ever knew that my mom was just like a real life Wyatt Earp!!